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well erick-
I have endured years of people looking puzzled as they attempt to pronounce my name that supposedly rivals the difficulty of david duchovny, arnold schwarzenegger,. jake gyllenhaal and keanu reeves. I never understood why so people **** this up .
P ayyy z?
P ehhh z?
P uhhh z?
P aww zee?
P oz z?
as in- I'm positive that you are a dumbass
Now lets look at the first 3 letters of my last name
PAU
what is the first thing that comes to mind?
PAUL !
y'know the biblical dude!
Ok if you are not one familiar with st. paul then surely you know this other fictional character
Paul Bunyan
among other greats such as,
Paul Ruebens
Paula Abdul
Paulie Shore
Paulie Walnuts
and a tricky one
Rush Limbaugh
How can you think anything else? Maybe the brain is not making this obvious connection somehow
I can't even think of any english words using -au- that doesn't have this -aw- sound as in - I'm awestruck at your phonetic impotence
Am I being harsh? No I don't think so
The brain is a very powerful machine able to make millions if not billions of instantaneous connections
Try reading this:
Did you konw you're a guiens? Jsut the fcat taht you can atllacuy raed tihs psot porves taht fcat. The huamn mnid is so pufowerl it can dcodee tihs txet eevn tguohh eervy sglnie wrod is slepled iocenrtclry. The one cavaet is taht the frist and lsat lertets are pervresed in erevy wrod. Cidrgbame Uitesirnvy cetoudncd a sduty and fnuod taht the biarn deos not raed eevry snlige lteetr, but wodrs as a wohle.
Did you amaze yourself?
but PAU confuses you??
bertstare.jpeg
i really enjoyed impressing myself and reading that last coded bit. this blog is so friendly.
ReplyDeleteWow. i sir am enlightened. And pissed! Stupid jerk people messing up our name, what the flying fuck these imbeciles and their stupid dumb mouths need to shut it, damn, son of a monkey's tail! Ahhh! I'm not really that angry but that was fun.
ReplyDeletecurious, did you write the misspelled paragraph or did you get it from Cambridge University?
bianca, i'm tusj lgda no neo was turh
ReplyDeleteerick, I found that online but there are others out there
If the pronunciation bothers you so much, just change your name to Paws!!
ReplyDeletefunny you should mention that Tear Wiper because when people would ask how it's pronounced, I would say "like dog paws," and for dramatic effect I would make a gesture with my hands like a dog about to pounce on someone's nads
ReplyDelete